Starting over

 How strange it seems to me that now when Max and Sammy tower above me, I am starting over with a baby so small, he fits inside of me.

At this moment when we are beginning to plan ahead for college tuition and missions, we are also starting over with  hospital bills and diapers.

Now that all 5 of my children know how to ride a 2 wheeled bike, we are starting over with a human so helpless we will move his legs in bicicle kicks to help him burp.

With my house so full of music, of singing and piano and cello, we are starting over with the music of coos and babbles.

As we are beginning to sleep through the night about half the time, we are starting all over again with up all night every night.

Just when I was starting to feel so competent and knowledgeable, a new baby brings feelings of so much insecurity and vulnerability.

I loved every second of all our babyhoods. I am so unbelievably excited that we get to start all over again. Kissing tiny fingers, watching for new smiles. I can’t believe how incredibly blessed we are to get to do it all over again with a new sweet boy.