Max (every night): "I love you Fuzzy Wuzzy" as he rubs Esther's head
Sammy wants to hold Esther all the time. He loves babies so much! He wants to prove he is as big as me so he holds her upright and tries to bounce her all around. It scares me to death, but actually he does it right. He totally remembers to support her head.
Phoebe came into the bathroom while I was getting ready for women conference. She had been dressed un her purple princess dress all day and her silver crown. She was so so excited to see me wearing a skirt! "Mommy you're a princess too!! You have a tutu!!! Here's your crown!"
Esther is the smiliest baby I've ever had. She smiles every day, huge laughing smiles. Each time it is like a special reward. I love this baby!
Phoebe always says, "You a bad poo poo!!" Whenever she's disappointed. Usually Sammy gets this :)
Sammy wants to be just like his daddy! They like stuff like ceviche, soccer, basketball. I love when he says emphatically, "I'm just like you Daddy!!" Or, "Ronaldinho Gaucho is our favorite soccer player, right Daddy?" They are both so into soccer right now. Every day when Javier gets home, Sammy begs him to go out and practice soccer and they have so much fun. They really try to get Max to come and sometimes he does and the three of them play for hours and have a blast, but other times Max would rather stay in and read a book. Max is such a fast reader and he loves reading. Last night he even read a book in Spanish!
99% of the time I feel like a pretty insufficient mother but every now and again something works out really well. Today I made grilled cheese sandwiches for lunch. Phoebe's was still hot when I gave it to her. I looked over to see Sammy blowing on it for her and said, "Phoebe aren't you lucky to have such a good brother. Sammy loves you so much!" Her little face lit up and she said with all her sweet little admiration, "I love you Sammy!" My little sweeties! It was a pretty beautiful moment. I'm so lucky to have such loving amazing kids.
Speaking of feeling insufficient I have been for such a long time. I feel so guilty about not serving more, not having more missionary experiences, just everything. Anyway, at women conference on Saturday one of the speakers talked about asking God about his plan for our lives so I did that. I prayed to ask him what he wanted me to do with my life, if he was pleased with me or if I needed to be doing more. I had a really beautiful experience. That verse about if you have brought even one soul unto me how great shall be your joy with him in the kingdom of my father came to my mind a little later. Usually that verse makes me feel so sad because I haven't brought any souls into the gospel but this time I was looking at my beautiful new baby and I thought about how much work it was to carry her and bring her into the world, how completely all consuming and I thought of all my children and how it fills my every moment, caring for them and teaching them and I could see them and how much joy I will feel if they become converted and it was like all the sudden the guilt was gone and I felt that although I will keep trying to serve and share the gospel and everything else, the work I am doing is worth more than all the cannery assignments I'm missing :) I love these dear ones! What an incredible relief that raising them and future children is God's plan for my life!!!
