Sometimes when my kids are fighting, I make them switch places. 

"Sammy you be Phoebe for a minute and Phoebe you be Sammy." Then I ask them to continue their argument. They learn a lot from this exercise. It helps them to really hear what the other sibling has been saying and to gain some empathy.  

Could we all do this for a second?

Could we take a moment and put ourselves in the place of our political adversaries and just argue their points in our imagination for a minute?

What are their fears?

Who are they trying to protect?

What injustice are they trying to correct?

What vulnerable group are they trying to support?

Why is that important to them?

Does their life experience make their perspective make more sense?

Do they have different challenges or experiences that make certain fears more relevant?

If you are not able to do this, maybe you haven't been listening very well this year. 

It is so tempting when our emotions are running so high to frame current events in terms of "Good and Evil." Is it really that simple? If we all took a step back from that radical black and white thinking, maybe we could have conversations that included more phrases like:

"I feel this would be best, what do you think?"

"Thank you for sharing your perspective, I hadn't thought of that."

"Your experience is different from mine. Thank you for sharing with me!"

"Is there some common ground we can both agree on?"

"I can see you care deeply about our country! So do I!"

"Where could we compromise?"

"How can we make this work for everyone?"

"I wonder if you have thought of this implication?"

"I would be upset if I had that experience too"

"Your concerns are valid and I know you are doing what you think is right!"

I believe if we can take a step back and a deep breath, we will see that we really do ALL love this country!! Then we can start to move forward out of this mess and see each other again the way we really are, as human beings trying to survive a very difficult time and make sense of a lot of overwhelming conflicting information. 

This post is for me more than anyone.

"Love can make the difference" -Gordon B Hinkley